Thursday, March 23, 2006

OK, only twenty two more chocolate-free days of Lent to go, but already I'm thinking about eggs. Chocolate ones, of course. The question is whether I buy one of those Cadbury creme eggs every day to save up for the biggest glutton fest ever, or be noble - and suffer. In the meantime, am practising egg party tricks to help with my Easter social skills. My latest is learning how to stuff an egg into a bottle. Yep, fun party goer me.

Easter is also, of course, a time for families, not just chocolate. (I'm joking, I'm joking. I'm a convent school girl. I know all about Easter.) Yesterday, Lynne and I did our first reading of Messages (see below) at the University of Kent, and it reminded both of us how much fun it was to respond to other people's writing. So today I'm going to do a cheesy link to my writing prompt, which is to write from this particular 'Message' from the book:

Three Word Games to play When Visits to Grandparents Get Boring without Getting Your Best Clothes Dirty or your Hair Messed Up
All games are for one or more players:

1. Allocate selected risque words to players before the visit. These words should have double meanings and, for smooth running of the game, be able to be used innocently in conversation. Suggestions could include Cock, Balls, Prick, Tit, Screw. Every time a grandparent utters the selected word gives five points to that player. Each player is responsible for keeping their own score.

Tips for playing – plan lines of conversation which will use your word beforehand. For example, if your allocated word is Balls, turning the talk to Wimbledon can give tremendous scope for point scoring. Grandfathers, in particular, tend to show particular interest in new balls. Grandmothers will use the word ‘Tit’ a lot when it is accompanied by a gift of some bird food for the garden.

2. This game involves the use of sports pages as a prop. Each player needs to take his/her turn of taking centre stage as it can only be played one at a time. The skill is in finding the exact moment when conversation reaches that mundane but involving point, e.g. a distant cousin’s marital problems, when the player can read out the football scores without being noticed. The winner is the player who reaches the end of the second division. Extra points for any third division games read out.

Tips for playing – keep the voice conversational with exclamations and inflection rises not reliant on score ends.

3. Dependent on a grandparent, usually grandmother, who finishes your sentences for you. Points are given for the number of sentences completed with a different ending than the one intended.

Tips for playing – practice your cliches.

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